Jenette Allen, Communications Coordinator, Center for Community Solutions

One in three teens will experience dating violence before they become adults, according to findings by Love Is Respect. Teens who experience emotional, physical, or sexual abuse are more likely to have unhealthy relationships in adulthood. The Center for Community Solutions wants to remind you that preventing abuse and assault is possible, but it is critical that we begin conversations with the young people in our lives. February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month so what better time than right around Valentine’s Day to start the conversation about healthy relationships?

A lot of unhealthy relationship behaviors are glamorized in movies and on television. Consider having a conversation after watching a show together. An example  conversation starter could be, “I noticed that the couple in that show only spent time together and never with other friends. Do you think that is a healthy relationship? What does a healthy relationship look like to you?” If you would like examples and breakdowns on relationships in media, check out the HOT Takes on the Center for Community Solutions' Prevention Education Team’s Instagram @ccs_prevents.

As you talk about characteristics of unhealthy relationships, be sure to discuss the ingredients for of a healthy relationship – C.H.A.R.M.

Communication

Tell others what you need and want. Ask questions instead of trying to guess what someone else needs.

Have Fun

In a relationship, you should feel safe and comfortable.

Acknowledge & Apologize

Making mistakes is an inevitable part of life. It is important to admit when you’ve made a mistake and make an effort to change your behavior in the future.

Respect

In a healthy relationship, your partner should not try to change you. Respect is about accepting your partner’s feelings and opinions, even if they are different from your own.

Make Space, Take Space

It is important to spend time together in a relationship, and it is equally important to spend time apart. It is not selfish to spend time alone or with other friends.

Relationships that do not have CHARM are not necessarily abusive; however, they may be somewhat unhealthy. Abuse is based on power and control; health is based on equality and respect.

February 6 through February 10 is the Center for Community Solutions’ Teen Dating Violence Awareness Week of Action. Stay tuned on social media (Instagram: @ccs_prevents & @ccs_sd) for activities to engage young people in conversations about healthy relationships.

Our Prevention Education Team provides a four-unit healthy relationship series for youth.  Please visit ccssd.org/education-outreach or email prevention@ccssd.org for more information.